21 September 2007

Frustration abounds!

I want to rant and rave. I would like to scream. I would like to curse. For someone that doesn't on a daily basis, I do let a word or two slip when I am really really angry. And guess what? There is only one person who is able to get me this angry! They've done it again and the worst word I have said is jerk! I am very proud of that!
For all of the mothers out there, we all know a little one needs consistency. They need a schedule and they need things to happen on time on a daily basis. A little slip up here and there is okay, but when you have a strong willed child you stick to the basics. Breakfast-snack-lunch-nap-snack-dinner-bath-book-bed. The in between can be sorted out. Sometimes it doesn't work. Sometimes the doctor appointment is at nap time, or the day is spent out and about. But you don't take them away from their nap for an entire week.
A certain someone is coming to town. It is inconvenient for them to have to visit here. INCONVENIENT!!!!! Really, I don't care.
It is even more INCONVENIENT that I won't let my little one travel across the country from state to state again for a month.
Oh, and it is completely unreasonable for them to visit this little one here, from after nap time until evening. Do they realize how hard it is to get said little one back on schedule after spending anytime away from home? Do they realize that little one cries for weeks for them and that they have already packed their bags and taken off? Do they even care?
When someone has a choice to live close enough to visit at least bi-monthly but chooses to go to (where they have been wanting to go) because it has better possibilities and it is more important to them to be able to provide (now we are not talking from broke to big money, we're talking from really good to better) and they choose the latter even though their little one will only see them at the most once a year... I don't feel sorry for them. I am not very tolerant. I don't give a crap how sad they get because when they come to town I don't let them do whatever they want even if they don't come to town that often. They chose this situation. The one suffering is their little one. THE LITTLE ONE HAS NO CHOICE! Cause if little one had a choice, little one wouldn't care if daddy lived in a card board box as long as he was around.
I am tired of someone trying to manipulate me. I am tired of being evil because I fight for what my little one deserves. I am tired of HIM making excuses for why he screws up, and continues to screw up and I am just plain tired!
Someday, someone is going to have some explaining to do, and I pray that little one is strong enough to get past the words of manipulation and that ability of HIM being able to rationalize every single situation to suit him and can see that LITTLE ONE deserved better.
Until that someday and probably far beyond I will fill little one's days with lots of love and will treasure every experience and hopefully the only one who hurts SOMEDAY is HIM!
I'm done.

3 comments:

AVIDINHA said...

doesn't sound like something a couple of elbows to the grill wont solve, and maybe you can knock some sence into him at the same time. either way, i got your back!

Retha said...

The page I see is unfamiliar to me, I hope it should be like this and you will be able to read my 2 cents worth.

I am so sorry for you to be in this situation!
Good to see that the most important to you is your Little Man! I know he will grow up and understand that you are there for him and have his best interest at heart.
All I can do is ask:
LORD, JESUS may your peace be over the Little Man and the Mommy! and NaNa.
May the three of them grow closer to each other and more like you everyday.
LORD, only you can intervene in a situation like this.
You know everything.
Thank you JESUS, for your peace and calm, in this household!

SusieJ said...

You are setting a great example for your children. I love this.